I love second-hand bookshops, and one’s just opened up around the corner from me. I live in an area full of hipsters and over-priced vegan cafés. It wasn’t like that when I first moved here. It’s changed over the years, and to be honest, I like it. I’m as happy to pay over the odds for a decent flat white as any hipster, and if it means more second-hand bookshops, then bring it on!
Anyway, my friend Mo and I went to the bookshop last weekend. It’s in an absolutely tiny corner building, so with social distancing, they only allow two people in at a time. Mo was still drinking her pricey takeaway coffee.
‘You go in’, she said. ‘I’ll wait and take care of Kerry.’
Sorry, I should have told you – Kerry’s my little Highland terrier – an absolute sweetie, but she suffers from separation anxiety.
‘Oh, she won’t stay with anyone. I’ll take her in with me.’
Two minutes later I was rushing out again. Yes, really, despite everything I said about loving second-hand bookshops.
‘Mo’ I said ‘we need to call the police. There’s a body under the floorboards in there!’
‘What?’ she said. ‘Have you gone crazy?’
‘No. It’s Kerry. She knew straight away. There was a tartan rug on the floor, and Kerry wouldn’t leave it alone. She was pulling at it, chewing it, trying to get underneath it. It was so embarrassing. So I joked with the owner, “Have you got a dead body under there?”
‘What did she say?’
‘She winked at me!’
‘Oh wow! Mo laughed. ‘So she’s got the same sick sense of humour as you.’
‘Oh no, Mo. My Kerry is a very wise dog. She wouldn’t miss something like a dead body. I’m calling the police right now!’
© Maisie Bishop