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Relax by John Quinn

8/4/2021

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‘I’ve never seen so much blood.’ Jimmy stood for effect, which, being only five foot seven, failed. He poured his splayed fingers through his thinning hair, the hair he’d described on the dating app as ‘luxurious.’ A little embarrassed, he sat down again; even to Jimmy it was obvious the date wasn’t going well.


‘What were you expecting?’ Miranda grinned. ‘Hadn’t you ever given blood before?’

‘Yes, er, no. I mean, I’d thought about it. Who hasn’t? But I passed out once, in the doctor’s surgery, when the nurse went to give me a jab. And I hit my head on that tray thing, you know, the one on wheels.’

Miranda had kind of lost the thread of the conversation, so thought it wise to nod. ‘Should we, you know, order something? I skipped lunch to make sure I’d be hungry.’

‘I know some big girls have to be careful about what they… Um, I didn’t mean that you’re… Oh, sod it, look I’m sorry. Feel free to just go now, if you want. At least that means you won’t have wasted your whole evening. I’ll pay for the drinks.’

‘No, it’s fine, really.’ 

‘It’s my fault, I’m not very good at small talk. Chatting up. Chit-chat. When I try to put someone at ease, I make them more nervous. One girl I met on the app asked if I was an MI5 interrogator; she said I put her so on edge she’d confess to anything.’

Miranda stifled a laugh. She’d been terrified – she’d never used a dating app before – and had to will herself through the wine bar’s doors. Now she was surprised to find herself enjoying the company of the desperately anxious, funny Jimmy. ‘Relax,’ she smiled naturally, ‘it takes a nervous wreck to recognise a kindred spirit.’
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    Issue 12

    April 2021


    Buy a Copy
    Booklet #12
    Booklet #12

    The Stories

    All
    A Family Visit By Sven Camrath
    A Rock And A Hard Place By Rachel Smith
    Evie By Graham Crisp
    Fifty Shades By Liz Berg
    Hell In Your Hand By Graham Crisp
    Highs And Lows By Mike Rymarz
    Just A Small Portion For Me By Deb Hollywood
    Ladies’ Day By R.T. Hardwick
    Losing Streak By Mike Rymarz
    Mavis & Mary By Darren Arthurs
    Peace
    Perfect Peace By R.T. Hardwick
    Playing By Ear By Susmita Ramani
    Rare By Cindy Pereira
    Relax By John Quinn
    Seedcake Or Eccles Cake By Graham Crisp
    Shaking A Leg By Susmita Ramani
    Survival Of The Fattest By Annie Wills
    The Driving Lesson By Steve Goodlad
    The House On The Hill By Susan Wicks
    The Improbable Win For Walsh’s Women By Steve Goodlad
    The Message On The Banner By Susmita Ramani
    The Winner Takes It All By Liz Breen
    Unheard By Elaine Peters
    Wedding Planner By Liz Berg
    Winners By Elaine Peters


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Secret Attic - Founded March 2020